What To Do if You Have a Hand Fetish (Or Any Sexual Fetish, For that Matter)

What to do if you have a hand fetish

Chances are, you’re familiar with the average foot fetish. If you go to porn sites or talk to people long enough, you’re likely to find people out in the world who have foot fetishes.

There are other common fetishes as well: hair fetishes, latex fetishes, sock fetishes… the list goes on and on! But one thing I’ve noticed is that many of my followers and clients specifically have hand fetishes, which I, of course, found very interesting!

Why Should we Talk About Hand Fetishes?

Up until recently, I didn’t know all that much about hand fetishes until I got LOTS of comments on my YouTube videos. As it turns out, hand fetishes (at least for people that subscribe to my channel) are fairly common.

Surprisingly, according to research, hand fetishes are some of the least common fetishes, with foot fetishes being one of the most common. Nonetheless, body part fetishes are very prevalent, making up about 33 percent of all fetishes, according to studies.

I actually have a sneaking suspicion that more people get sexual pleasure from hands than they think. Hands might give you arousal, but perhaps you haven’t realized that it’s the hand itself that piques your sexual desire.

A Lot of People Misunderstand the Term “Fetish.”

sexy hands in bed

Your girlfriend might have a closet packed with shoes. She might crack the joke, “I have a total shoe fetish!” Your average American lady that owns shoes does not actually have a shoe fetish.

So what is a fetish, exactly?

A sexual fetish is something your sexual arousal and satisfaction RELIES ON.

In other words, you NEED this object or scenario in order to experience sexual pleasure and reach orgasm.

A kink, on the other hand, is something you find sexually exciting that is also taboo.

For example, if you had a real shoe fetish, you would need shoes in order to get off. Shoes would be your fetish object. That might mean that you need footwear to be around during sex, or that you need a shoe in your mouth, or that you need your partner wearing shoes, or that you have to see someone having sex with that fetish object. That is a fetish.

Why Do People Experience Arousal through Inanimate Objects?

Fetishes are very common. But unfortunately, they’re not well understood. The best guess that we have is that fetishes come from early childhood.

At one point, this inanimate object, body part, or sensation got wired into your brain as being sexually relevant… before you were even conscious of possessing sexual attraction to begin with!

What is a Hand Fetish?

A hand fetish is a fetish that is centered around hands. Men and women alike can have hand fetishes – it doesn’t matter who you are or what’s in your pants, fetishes are equal-opportunity. In fact, when I was researching sexual attraction to hands, I found a LOT of heterosexual fetishist women who were talking about their sexual excitement over male hands. Some ladies love a good man hand, and there’s nothing wrong with that!

What Should You Do If You Have a Hand Fetish?

woman playing electric guitar

Are you wondering if you have a fetish? If this is the case, what can you do about it?

Accept yourself!

You are perfect just as you are. It’s GREAT that you have a fetish, no matter if your fetish is centered around bondage, diapers, genitals, sadism, age play, underwear, or anything else.

Humiliation doesn’t belong here. There is absolutely NOTHING to be ashamed of. Self-acceptance is the ACTUAL first step. Love yourself, regardless.

Seek out content/material/pornography/images/videos/stories that excite and arouse your hand fetish.

There’re tons of stuff out there that can satisfy your hand fetish fantasy, and the more you know about yourself, the more you can enjoy your fetish.

The more vids you watch or porn you look at, the more you’ll know about yourself and your own fetish. You might come to realize that you LOVE it when people wash their hands. You might only be turned on if a hand is spanking.

These are two totally different ways of experiencing sexual arousal around hands… and the more you know, the more often you can leverage this magical fetish to reach orgasm!

Share with Your Partner!

How great is it to learn something about yourself, and to know what works for you? Most partners are interested in helping their partner feel sexually satisfied! If you just hit this jackpot of information, you can share that information with your partner … if you feel comfortable doing so.

I personally have never been partnered with someone who had a hand fetish (that I knew about!), but if I had known, I would have been so interested in what I could have done to use my hands in order to sexually satisfy that person during any sexual act! Seriously, how fun is that?!

I hope that if you have a hand fetish, you can share that information with your partner. Hopefully the two of you can make sex fun and incorporate it into your sex life in a way that feels good for everybody and brings you closer together. Sometimes the more info your partner has, the better. The more they know about your fetish, the more pleasure and closeness can exist between partners. The more the fantasy comes to life.

Your Fetish Is Perfectly Normal. But It’s Okay If You Want to Talk to Someone Who Understands.

happy couple enjoying coffee

To recap: a fetish is something that is required for sexual arousal. You can take enjoyment in something, or be interested in something, or even get aroused by something, that isn’t a fetish.

Fetishes are perfectly cool – they are not uncommon, and there’s nothing to feel ashamed about.

Now, if your fetish is causing problems, I highly recommend you go speak to someone about it. For example, if your fetish is getting in the way of you being able to experience a close sexual partnership with someone else, by all means, go see a sex therapist, a sex coach, and seek resources that will help you make that fetish a workable part of your life. If this sounds like you, be sure to apply for a Free Discovery Call with me today. Together, we can unpack your fetish for the best sex of your life!  

But if your fetish isn’t causing you any problems, congratulations! You know something about your sexuality that can make sex even more incredible. Share this information with your partner in a way that feels safe and comfortable and consensual for both of you so that the two of you can involve your fetish in your sexual play, and make sex even more satisfying for both of you.

Boost Confidence and BE YOU In Bed

If you want to gain unshakable confidence, foster a better relationship with your body AND partner, and end premature ejaculation for good, Come When You Want is my step-by-step guide to lasting longer in bed and achieving ejaculatory control. It delivers many of the same tools I use in one on one coaching but in a video format you can access from your phone or computer. Check it out! The first step to an amazing sex life is to learn and dive in.

Check out Caitlin V’s new Relationship tool to deepen intimacy and connection.